Thursday, August 13, 2009

life in perspective.

so it's about time i wrote a post from me - just from me - my random thoughts in all their craziness. :) well...needless to say most people that know me wouldn't consider me "normal" - i'm a pretty far stretch - but isn't everyone weird in some GREAT way? i love that people are so different! it is so inspiring and encouraging to see how different and creative and ingenius our amazing God is, who created all of us. i love that french fries at wendy's don't taste as good alone as they do dipped in a frosty. these two tastes couldn't be more different but together... mmmm. it's perfect how the Lord uses differences in people to highlight each other's strengths and how even in collaboration as a church, He uses that to bring a sweeter taste of Jesus to those that might be looking in. our God is beautiful.

so recently i've made a big move back to charlotte, the city i grew up in. it's been wonderful to be with family again! i couldn't love it more. i've been able to take some music lessons, work on a ton of design projects and dream about ways the Lord might direct my steps. I'm such an open book - some people asked when i left raleigh, what my plan was.... and my only answer is that i didn't know - i knew i needed to move but that was about it. so we'll see what the Lord will do. I am His. i've clarified this a lot recently in random conversations but i thought it would be worth clarifying here as well since i don't get to talk to all of you on an ongoing basis... A common question I get is "what are your plans with your music? are you pursuing a label?" or "oh! you're touring! that's exciting!" or "what do you think it's gonna take for you to get to the next level?"
and well... here's my answer and a pre-qualifier - i don't say what i'm going to say to take away from people's joy and excitement from what the Lord might be doing in my life, because I am grateful for the questions, and grateful that people care to know what is going on - but i just want to make my purpose clear - from the beginning it was never my intention to pursue a music career... never my intention to pursue a label or to become a "successful Christian artist" - don't get me wrong, i don't desire to be an awful artist, haha - but from the beginning, it has been my sole interest to pursue Christ. Him alone. To follow where He leads. I write songs to Him - for Him. (and by "for Him" i don't mean on His behalf", i mean my life is no longer mine - I am a servant of the cross - so i write to point myself and others to him and to thank and praise him for who He is and all He's done) Tomorrow I may go to be with Him - or He may open a door for me to go overseas - or I could lose my voice and have to find a new way to point to Him - but that's our goal, right? it's to point to Him with every breath He gives - with all the strength that I can find (which He provides :)...such mercy) I can't wait to see what tomorrow holds but overall, the Word tells us to not be anxious about tomorrow for each day holds enough worry of it's own - and I LONG to be found faithful today.... that is hard enough.

one of my best friends in life has recently been diagnosed with a disease that is similar to cancer -- it could be fatal, but she is walking the path the Lord has set before her and without complaint - i see the peace of God in her eyes and hear it in her words. I have a different path before me at the moment than she does but God could change either one of our paths at any moment and it would all be to the praise of the glory of HIS GRACE. She knows that we can't plan our steps - the Lord has set His plan in motion and what a blessing it has been, that our eyes have been opened to behold this plan and to love this God, to know the faithfulness and witness the love of Jesus. it's an amazing life we live. may we live in light of eternity.